Me: Damn, I gotta go outside and get lunch. I’m starving.
Common Sense: Don’t do it, playa. It’s dangerous out there!
Me: Dangerous!? Man, if you don’t get TF!
CS: Be safe, my dude..
Me: I’m a gangsta!
Temperature: Say, word!?
Wind + Wind Chill: Here, hold my drank.
Me: Whaddup, den!? Get buck!
W+WC: Man MUPHUCK yo coat, cuh! Oh, take this 3 piece to the face witcha!
W+WC: This our set now, lame!
Me: Y’all got it!
CS: Told you.. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Tuesday, January 17, 2017
Her: You just take everything.
Him: What chu’talmbot?
Her: My breasts, my time.
Him: I mean, they’re mine.
Her: Say what now?
Him: I commandeered them.
Her: Oh really?
Him: I claimed them.
Her: Not fair!
Him: What do you want me to say?
Her: A woman just can’t have nothing these days SMH.
Continue reading “Retractable”
September 6, 2016
Me: Happy Anniversary, Baby!
Continue reading “Work, Part II”
September 2, 2016
Weight Watchers, Cocoa: I
Weight Watchers: So, we’re still on for dinner tonight, right?
Me: But of course! I’m a hit the gym, shower, and get right at chu.
Continue reading “Cocoa, Part II”
September 1, 2016
Gym: I, II, III
Gym: So, back to what I was saying before you distracted me – who was you talking to?
Me: Man, wha!
Gym: When you walked in here earlier, you were on the phone. Who. Was. She. Vince?
Continue reading “Gym, Part IV”